Living Well When You're a 'Woman of a Certain Age'
Go ahead, explore life – you’ve earned it!
She’s a role model
Family has always been important to Betty Fenicle (left) of Bethlehem, but her grandchildren—four nearby and three in California—became the lights of her life after her husband died. She takes them to soccer games, participates in school events, cooks with them, shoots hoops and gets down on the floor to play. “Keeping up with them keeps me young,” she says. As a member of the Bethlehem Red Stars chapter of The Red Hat Society, Fenicle, 68, is an excellent role model for her 8-year-old granddaughter, Emily, who wants to know when she can be a Red Hat. Read more...
She’s the queen
What began as a conversation at a Christmas party among Liz Reinhard (right), 69, her sister and a few friends blossomed into the Bethlehem Red Stars. This chapter of The Red Hat Society was officially incorporated in April 2004. Reinhard oversees their activities as the Queen Mother. "There are no rules or regulations," she says. "Our sole purpose is to have fun and offer companionship to each other." Read more...
Our ‘Best Ways to Enjoy Life’
This advice is from the Bethlehem Red Stars, a local chapter of The Red Hat Society:TravelTake a napSpend time with grandchildren and great-grandchildren Don’t be a stick-in-the-mud—stay activeTake care of yourself and see your doctor regularlyCare for othersDon’t think of yourself as oldDon’t sweat the small stuffGo out for mealsCelebrate good friends and familyLook forward to each dayIf you see a group in red hats, go talk to them!
“Now it’s your turn!” says Joanne Cohen-Katz, Ph.D., Lehigh Valley Hospital and Health Network psychologist and life coach. “For many women, the years after menopause are the most creative, productive and fulfilling. They’re less worried about pleasing others and doing what’s expected, and more interested in exploring their own potential. It can be the most alive time of your life.”
At the same time, she says, this transition can be unsettling—especially if you’re redefining your identity or questioning relationships. “It’s important to realize this is a natural transition,” she says. “You’re not crazy if you feel a sense of unrest or dissatisfaction. These feelings are meant to be acknowledged and explored. Don’t rob yourself of your vitality by stifling your impulses.”
It’s also OK to ask for help with the transition, says family physician Elizabeth Stanton, M.D., of Lehigh Valley Hospital and Health Network. Talk to your doctor, a therapist, spiritual advisor or other women who’ve been through it, especially if you’re considering radical changes.
Many women have found camaraderie and inspiration through The Red Hat Society, a national sisterhood of nearly 1 million dedicated to fun and friendship after age 50. Named for a phrase in the poem “Warning,” by Jenny Joseph (“When I am an old woman I shall wear purple…with a red hat that doesn’t go”), the Society embraces silliness and support among kindred spirits. You can join one of 37,000 existing chapters, or start your own chapter.
Your body as well as your spirit needs special attention after age 50. “Your energy levels change as you get older,” Stanton says. “Set boundaries and learn to say no. Spend time on yourself, keep up healthy diet and exercise habits, and get regular checkups and screenings.” If you’re bothered by hot flashes or other menopause-related problems, Stanton says, see your doctor. Today’s treatment options include low-dose hormone therapy for short periods, prescription medications and over-the-counter remedies such as herbal supplements.
Sometimes, physical changes can be the catalyst for a change in attitude. “You realize as your body changes that you don’t have forever, and it’s time to decide what’s important,” Cohen-Katz says. “Give yourself permission to explore all the options. And enjoy this time of liberation and freedom!”
She works hard and plays hard
Whether skiing, biking, playing golf, taking Pilates classes or walking, Mary Lou Gilotti of Lehighton plans to stay physically active as long as she can. She also keeps going socially and mentally by taking classes, maintaining good friendships and volunteering with several community organizations. Gilotti, 61, and her husband, Vince, 63, also work together in their real estate appraisal business and enjoy traveling. “I’m fortunate to have a spouse who shares the same attitude and interests,” she says. “We enjoy life together!” Read more...She urges wise decisions
Elizabeth Stanton, M.D., is not one to sit still, but she understands the importance of recognizing your limitations. “I love to play softball, but I’ve decided not to slide anymore,” says the 53-year-old family physician. “You have to accept that you’re not 20, and maybe can’t—or shouldn’t—do things the way you used to.” Most important, she says, is to carve out time for yourself. Read more...She found new life after tragedy
Lorraine Gyauch of Fogelsville was a full-time homemaker and mother when, at age 42, she lost her husband suddenly. Despite low self-confidence, she went to college and discovered a love of learning. Today she’s a nurse educator who works with patients and others affected by cancer, sharing her unique blend of Eastern philosophy and Western medicine. She’s proud of her 64 years. “Life is a gift to be celebrated,” she says, “and wrinkles aren’t painful.” Read more...
This page last updated 2/12/08 04:08 PM
